The weekend before

I mention in my first post that I will stop drinking after a wine tour weekend I have booked with the husband.

What a weekend we have had! So many wines, cheeses, laughs, delicious food and making friends. It’s scared me a little. I keep thinking what if I can’t have this kind of fun without the wine? Why am I quitting again? I love wine what am I thinking? This is all before I’ve even stopped so what is it going to be like when I am having a moment of weakness! The feeling of failure start kicking in again.

I drank so much yesterday I was hoping for the hangover from hell today so I always remember it when I think about drinking again in the future. Not a hangover in site, it’s one of those fluke days when you know you should have one, you deserve one and you wait for it to arrive but nothing! Typical!

So today is officially my last day of drinking. We are going round to our best friends with the wine we bought from the tour and also some yummy cheeses to celebrate the last day of my drinking. I’m not sure if I am doing the right thing celebrating the end of an era as I might associate it with being happy, maybe I need to associate it with unhappy?

In a weird way I’m excited about the next 3 months, focussing on the positives that I will feel from this experience and really hoping I love it so much that it turns into forever!

Day 1 tomorrow. I have drank heavy this week and it’s Monday morning tomorrow so I am expecting to feel low in mood, swollen from the amount of food I have eaten and super tried due to the rubbish alcohol induced sleeps. Let’s see!

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