My stats so far
143 drinks not consumed
17,389 calories saved
WOW JUST WOW!!!
That’s pretty motivating eh?! The money saved so far I actually think is more than that. I get these stats from an app called I’m done drinking. When you register its asks you on average how much you drink and how much you spend on booze so I based mine on an average, not taking into consideration what I spend when I’m out for meals or drinks in the pub.
I had a very social weekend. Friday night I was out for a meal with friends. We went to a French restaurant. I drank water as they didn’t have any other options. I had a great night. Previously when going for a meal and drinking I would focus on the wine, I’d be like oooo I cant wait to have a big cold glass of white wine. This time I really focused on the food and it was great, the conversion was great and before I knew it we had been sat there for 3 hours and I didn’t miss drinking at all. When we left I walked to the station, clear minded and feeling fresh and arrived home happy. I couldn’t help think back to that awful train journey I had when I vomited. I felt quietly smug.
Saturday I had a friends birthday lunch. I wasn’t really looking forward to this one as I didn’t know anyone and usually I would throw back the drink until I felt comfortable enough t talk a load of shit. I arrived and it was a smaller group than I expected so that made me feel better. I had a mocktail which was nice. Again I focused on the food and it was so good! I only stayed a couple of hours at this one. I’ve decided that I am only going to stay in situations as long as I am comfortable, at least until I get used to it.
I’ve really noticed that if I am with people that I don’t know that well and if we have no connection or chemistry /no common ground then its hard work. It can actually be exhausting. It nothing against that person at all, or me either its just that not everyone can be best friends. I have been beating myself up about this lately. Thinking that I have lost my conversation skills, why don’t I have anything to say? I end up interviewing them, asking them a heap of questions just to feel like we are having a conversation. I need to learn to make my excuses and walk away from these people. Instead I’ve been thinking its because I’m not drinking, if I was drinking we would be having a deep conversation now about how their dog died 10 years ago and they are seeing a counselor about it. LOL. Isn’t it funny how you can go from being a complete stranger to absolute soul mate in 1 night, well until the next day when you cant remember any of it and realize it was all fake. That’s happened so many times to me.
It makes me feel sad but I think its unrealistic to think that this won’t affect some of my friendships. I can see it already. I struggle with it a little but it is what it is. I am gravitating towards my friends where drinking is not the base of what we are doing. One particular awesome friend is taking me to a flotation tank, we decided that as I am not drinking that once every 3 months we will do something new such as a cookery class, a hike or whatever!
I’m learning lots on this journey and I am really enjoying it, so much more than I thought I would. A lot of people are asking me what will I do after the 3 months, the answer is I really don’t know. Saying I won’t drinking alcohol for ever is a daunting prospect and not a decision I am ready to make yet but I feel like I am heading in a good direction. Bring on the final 4 weeks!