Christmas Party

So I had my Christmas Party on Friday night. If this took place 6 weeks ago I would have probably not gone but now nearly 12 weeks done I am so much stronger. On the lead up I was apprehensive, very. I mean its a free bar. This would usually mean an endless glass of bubbles.

This year I made as much effort as I usually would to get excited about it, I tried to treat it no different just because I wasn’t drinking. I picked a outfit that I felt good in as I thought if I wear something I am not comfortable in then it could be the difference of me not enjoying myself as I would usually just drink loads of booze until I felt comfortable, but that wasn’t an option this time.

Another thing that made me anxious a little beforehand is that in social situations since I’ve not been drinking, when I am around large groups of people that I am not familiar with I feel really awkward. I have actually always felt like this but again I would guzzle down a few glasses then start to relax and talk a loads of shit to anyone who would listen to me. This time I had to rely fully on my real personality and I genuinely wasn’t sure if it was good enough to hold sober conversations for a length of time. This is silly I know but self doubt is self doubt and this is what was gong through my head. It also wasn’t just a bunch of strangers, my team were there who I just love and also another couple of good friends but I didn’t want to rely on people to be there just because I felt awkward.

The evening came and we all got glammed up, I was really feeling the vibe as I just thought to myself, Emma you cannot dread these events forever, I have to realise that I can have just as much fun without thinking I need to drink. I cracked open my first Heineken zero.

In my head I thought if I last 3 hours I will be happy.

Result – I lasted from 4pm and left at 9.30pm. 5 and a half hours. I was so pleased with myself and I genuinely had a really great time. I only left at that time because its such a mission to get home as I have to get the train and 2 taxi’s. I was fully alert and felt safe on the journey home, I didn’t fall asleep on the train nor did I throw up all over myself. I arrived home with a grin on my face, made some toast and debriefed the hubby on the night. I woke up the next day fresh as a daisy.

A phrase I heard recently. Nobody regrets not drinking the night before the day after. LOL how bloody true that is!

I had a few people asking my about why I am not drinking but not too many, I had one your boring comment off someone that I didn’t expect but I just laughed at him, I just didn’t care. I cant believe how far I have come.

17 thoughts on “Christmas Party

  1. Good job! I also worry that my personality won’t be interesting enough at a party if I’m sober. I’ve only just started so I haven’t yet had to negotiate a party, but now I’ll remember your good experience when I do. Thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Not far. 22 days today. It has been very up and down. It’s good to know that it got easier for you after 8 weeks. It is still early days for me so hearing about others’ experiences is very helpful. Thank you!

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Brilliant 👍
    You are smashing this Emma.
    I find people ask me about giving up and are really supportive about it all. They do however all then tell me that they don’t drink much at all, ‘only on a Thursday to Sunday’, don’t drink in the week .. blah blah. It’s like I’ve become the alcohol police and everyone feels the need to defend themselves 😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. So funny! Last night I was out for a meal with 20 plus people. I was sat with a group of friends I’ve known for ages. They all said ‘I keep within my units generally’ or ‘I’ve really cut back recently’ etc. They then kept asking how much I’d been drinking saying things like ‘so did you drink every day?’, ‘were you having a bottle of wine to yourself most evenings?’. It was like they were telling themselves ‘I’m not as bad as Claire was so I’m ok to carry on’! Ironically they all sat there with at least a bottle each and drank the lot (and more). That’s fine with me, I’m not here to persuade others but I feel I make them uncomfortable!! Xx


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